i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
