Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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