I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
