: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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