i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize