Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
