forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
