I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
