I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
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