Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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