Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
