i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
There's even glitter on my cock...
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