Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
