Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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