her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like heaven, but drunker
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize