Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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