I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
