small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
did i walk over a car last night?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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