We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
