She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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