just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I miss vodka workout Fridays
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
