I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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