they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
