We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
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