ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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