I can't watch pbs sober anymore
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
