Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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