'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
