Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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