Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I don't think brook has ever known best
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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