I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Randomize