Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
