Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
