She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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