I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Randomize