Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
