but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
