This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
