im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
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