I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
