Bisexual people are plain selfish.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
