there's paper in my vomit.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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