What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
