Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
The beer is more important than you right now.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
