omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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