I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
