I wish i was in the wii world.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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