i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Can't talk, ducks in the car
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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