yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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