i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
